Sometimes I wonder if we could be friends if we lived closer.
you went through ur friends list and posted an obscene comment on every ultrasound pic...."not his" "looks like a sea monkey"
wouldnt it be awesome if walks of shame were like charity walks...you could get sponsors and shit and donate money to curing STDs or cancer
There are pictures of you on the shoulders of some old guy dressed as borat
Well I could just do a roadtrip and hit them all. Slut tour 2012.
I have a new philosophy. Fuck wearing bras, it's summertime.
My life is a joke. Told everyone last night that they could call me Mrs. McCormick because I'm gonna end up alone with a handle of peach vodka anyways.
2 men making out for 2 seconds to trick a cop so they don't get arrested for being pulled over rolling a blunt is not gay.
We laughed. We cried. We came everywhere.
I managed to get through my meeting without throwing up in someone else's office, so there's that for an accomplishment today.
He walked in wearing nothing but a WWF belt and yelled "THE CHAMP... IS... HEEERE!!!"
You know Sunday Funday was a success when 'puke and rally' came at lunchtime on Monday.
Shriek
Congrats! Its a fuck boy!
somehow I wound up on the floor crying about his beard. then telling everyone I'd give him a "lesbian blowjob".
If you find out what that means, show me.
21st birthday weekend in Vegas has concluded and all I'm missing is my underwear and 'Contacts' icon on my phone home screen.
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