so then she threw up in his asshole
yep..that'll do it.
just rolled a joint with wrapping paper.. and you say i have no christmas spirit
I'm customer of the month for a 3rd time now at the Wine store. I've achieved so much in my life
You basically told your boyfriend at the time you were going to shit in his hands.
And I meant every ounce of it.
I've just never had a dinner guest strut in, go directly to my bathroom, vomit.. then come out demanding whiskey and food.
That little tingle vodka gives me in my esphagus is what lets me know I'm still alive.
All i remember about last night is holding a bottle of bacardi and screaming challenge accepted!
Sooo the theme of my 21st is rapidly becoming Gay Mexico
We would be rich. And the whole world would be stoned.
He kept walking up to every girl at the party saying "Hi, I'm George Clooney. No I won't marry you." He left with three girls.
Was it just me or did you also find it awkward when "glad you came" started playing on pandora right after you finished?
his basement wasnt heated so when i asked for a hoodie someone gave me a kimono.. i passed bc who the fuck knows where that shit has been recently
you dont know your limits until you wake up with a black eye and a bruised rib and find out you got ran over by a bicycle last night
That amount of times your family has seen my boobs is getting ridiculous.
I just watched my ex butt chug a quart of eggnog. Why did I dump her again?
Randomize
