Your tits are I can't wait for
Best news ive heard all week. The cougars r coming! The cougars are coming!
my dog ran away and came back with a marajuana plant. what are you doing tonight?
We got them high and they had an hour long debate on the best way to get cum out of eyes.
you better fuck at least one or both of them.
I mean, keeping the tube socks on AND taking cell phone pictures that he didn't ask for during sex? that's two strikes kiddo.
After walking in on us in the living room, he still insisted that he slept in my bed with me afterwards.
Don't worry, your car is safe with me. I am throwing watermelons out of it at mailboxes and hipster kids.
She's popping painkillers like they're tic tacs and singing the soundtrack to dreamgirls. It's you're turn to babysit her.
I just saw a black chick with an eyepatch. This is a once in a lifetime opportunity.
This is the beginning of the end. Testicle Tuesdays and free ball Friday are going to scar people for life
Dude that picute of your balls will haunt my nightmares
Every morning should start with 2 orgasms and a shoulder massage
GIIIIRL I AM STONED AF AND I HAVE A HOMEMADE POT PIE IN THE OVEN THIS PARTY IS LIT.
I haven't even lived here for 24 hours yet, and I've already banged someone. My new hoe life is off to a great start.
I feel like i'm being yelled at when you type in all caps.Did you just have bad sex?
Sometimes I feel like my vagina has a photographic memory of his penis. It sucks that he got engaged....
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