dude i dont realllllly have to fuck her do i? its just a mess down there and i think im gonna cry
I tried to go shot for shot with some guy called "shit show martinez"
you made wolf sounds and yelled "team me" the entire movie
under NO circumstances is it acceptable to fist pump to taylor swift
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Its the little things i like about bein home like having actual toilet paper instead of subway napkins
its not a party unless mikie exposes himself
I feel I must have sex with him first to fully decide where my vagina belongs.
hahaha every time i hear a motorcycle i think about that one time you almost died
Thanks for the flashbacks you prick.
I should be free tonight unless my 5 speed vibrator arrives in the mail today, than we might have scheduling conflicts.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Timehop reminded me that 4 years ago today I helped a one armed man do the YMCA by being his other arm.
We just had sex in the shed while having a conversation about cheeseburgers...so that's how my day is going
Had a vaginal orgasm. I feel like I made sex my bitch.
Uhm... Found a ziploc bag... In the freezer. Sam, thought it was lemonade. Why did you make frozen piss at my house, again?
i cant believe the cop was fine with you saying no we are in a hurry when he asked to search your car
If I hear the phrase 'these unprecedented times' one more time I'm putting my foot up someone's ass.
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