Fuck Jersey, the house im in is so baller but this state just cannot win.
i now know from two sources i am better at making out and giving head than she is. and not by a little either.
the crunchwrap supreme is the def leppard of the taco bell menu
which is why it's clearly superior
after I pulled back my foreskin she said, "cool like a transformer". I really like her now.
she left out the fact that she had a kid until she told me not to suck on her tits too hard or milk would come out.
hypothetically speaking is slutty or smart to buy plan b before we go on spring break so i dont have to get it in mexico
Oh and jess is gonna pee in our guest bedroom to mark her territory.
Last time I stayed at my moms my fucking car got set on fire sooo maybe I should think this through.
My friend and I just coined a new term. OBJ. The obligatory blow job. You totally know what I'm talking about.
Like if he goes down on you first, or you just don't want to bone him yet. OBJ.
Hes a nice guy and all but I'm only interested in his drunken alter ego.
I did the mature thing and subtweeted that bitch. She follows me so she'll see.
I need to ask my mom where the drain cleaner is, but I'm afraid she'll ask why and the answer to that will just be "cum."
well I woke up with about $3 in odd change and a note that said "I'm borrowing your weed." So, no, it didn't go to well.
I'm just opting for alcohol abuse, ramen and cuddling with my dog for now.
If drinking had a "new high score" I think I hit it this weekend.
Randomize
