Bts the comment you were making during that picture was "look we have penises"
I just set a weed brownie on fire in the microwave.
Successful day.
My little brother got home at 4am too, we drunk ate together. It was a kodak moment.
I'm sorry I kept calling last night when you wouldn't pick up. I'm REALLY sorry I sang "You Oughta Know" on more than 4 voice mails.
"Students using Axe body spray to light selves on fire" is a real headline from a real newspaper. WHY AREN'T WE DOING THIS RIGHT NOW?
"Whiskey Cheerios" was a terribly great idea.
I Think it is all interconnected. Emma caused most of the nakedness
Am I texting you while being used as a stripper pole by two half-naked women? hint: I am.
i spent an hour trying to convince my psychiatrist that the fact that i showed up for my appointment drunk was progress, and she does not agree
I'm eating a piece of cake like an apple. At least my thought process is healthy.
I would not be 19 again if you paid me. Guess who found naked pictures of themselves? Fuck cocaine
I had to put a towel over my laptop because the little power light was too bright. New hangover low.
We started off talking about nice cuddling and you turned it into fucking with a Santa hat on...
I can't believe there are people our age getting engaged and I can't even find a solid coke dealer.
If you’re wondering why the bong is outside the garage door just know I was being environmentally efficient by not using the freezer to chill my shit
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