Can you believe The 5th Element didn't get best fight scene in 1997?! I'm still bitter. 12 years later.
Haha how do you remember that?
HOW COULD I FORGET?!
i'm not a hellocoptur, but youer in a dorm ans im un a dorm
I've been practicing for you. Including stockpiling medical supplies for curing hangovers.
a kid puked on the floor and instead of, you know, cleaning it they cut a square out of the carpet with a boxcutter and threw it outside
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It sounds like heaven mixed with world peace and orgasms. The acoustics in this car are awesome. Or it's the weed idk either way it's great
Go big or go home. i snuck in two beers in my bra. im here to win.
I had a great time except for the part where you called another guy, told him you were in a cab - not on a date - and that you'd meet him at a bar in 15 minutes. but besides that it was awesome. Next time capping you at two glasses of wine
Last night you told me to stop being Martha Stewart and asked if I had Taco Bell in my house
You better keep a close eye on your uterus tonight cause I am looking good.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
call me with an emergency in 5 min. This chick has a strap on hangin behind the bathroom door.
She's trying to change her flight... IM BEING COCKBLOCKED BY DELTA CUSTOMER SERVICE
... why is there baby oil , black socks and frozen hot dogs in the sink this morning ?
nyquil+orgasm=very intense and oddly interesting
Well, I like big penises but it's not like he walks around with it out or anything so yes I think he has beautiful eyes
I texted him "my vagina is pounding for you"
I know, you made me proof read it.
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