nothing screams I HAVE A PROBLEM! like the case of miller lite sitting on top of my DUI papers in the passenger seat of my car. lol
If i die in the snow, get to my laptop and delete all of the nickelback. password is "barry"
as in "white"?
like we started out all organized and composed and within thirty mins people were throwing up in the bushes, arguing over a beer bong and jumping in the pool with their clothes on
She loves me even though she knows all Ive done. Shes kind of like jesus.
he said it was like fucking a big sack of slut potatoes
Is there a fine for having sex in the back of a zipcar?
Am I allowed to compare getting cum'd on the face to a warm summer rain?
I feel that my cleavage set an unattainably high bar for 2013.
So glad the long weekend is over so I can bring this bender to a merciful end.
Never drinking again. Maybe, if our boss gave us more 3-day weekends we would know how to handle ourselves. That was a shit show.
Tempting guys with beer and cheese. How Midwestern are we?
So I have been told that I licked your eyebrows last night
i swear i was one second from getting his number and then the shrooms kicked in
I went to BBQ fest on Wednesday and came home wearing a different shirt, so I think I did some good damage.
Apparently I'm some kind of sexual camel.
Randomize
