I met a girl last nite that charged by the inch. i didnt have enough money but i figured shed be a good deal for u
remember that time i ran away from the bar and passed out in a street cot?
neither do i
there was a guy here who managed to get his head stuck in a fishbowl. no, I don't fuckin know how
her dad is making me watch Glen Beck, i only agreed because i penetrated his daughter earlier.
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so, what part of "he's slept with a guy" do you not understand?
Let's have sex soon. Just us!! Its sad that I have to specify.
What did he say? I couldn't hear him over the sound of how awesome his beard is.
We shaved off his eyebrows I'm pretty sure his fiance will be thrilled at the wedding
Seeing the pictures of him and i, I'm giving whiskey the win on this one. Definitely had beer goggles.
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And now I have fucked a local celebrity so double free drinks at bars.
Drinking vodka and pirating music in the library. Welcome to finals week.
Can we just smoke a few bowls and eat grilled cheese while drunk in our hotdog suits at 9am ?
I saw a groundgog last night outside my back door. I now have a new wedding gift idea.
Good, be his mentor. Like a tiny gay Yoda.
I'm owning this being a social human being thing tonight!