Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

ADVERTISEMENT

ADVERTISEMENT

ADVERTISEMENT

ADVERTISEMENT

(586): View more from Michigan

We drank from noon till 5 am, there was adderall and nice jews involved it was just crazy

Fav 3 1805 795
share tweet
(616): View more from Michigan

when you close your eyes do you see, that mystical creature will be me.

(248): View more from Michigan

who is this?

Fav 4 1404 1352
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT

(614): View more from Ohio

She said I could do whatever I wanted to her. I pumped for 20 seconds, apologized, rolled over and passed out. I sit directly across from her at work. Awkward?

Fav 34 1499 8862
share tweet
(917): View more from New York City

Apparently throwing up on his dick didnt convince him to stay away . . . whats the most indirect way of saying "im just going to continue avoiding you"?

Fav 15 833 2987
share tweet
25 People Admit the Worst Things They’ve Done for Good Reasons
Read it at the TFLN blog
(708): View more from Illinois

We're gonna have to suck it up and start making out for free drinks. No homo. I'm watching Tyra "I kissed a girl and I got free drinks."

(1-708): View more from Illinois

Let's do it. All homo

Fav 30 4754 993
share tweet
(909): View more from California

I gave him a handjob while watching the presidential address. Needless to say, it was weird.

Fav 31 1324 4149
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT

(910): View more from North Carolina

Being home sucks. I haven't drank in like a week. Or smoked cigs. Or done drugs. Or had sex. My body is shutting down.

(803): View more from South Carolina

Omg. It's like you're one of those deprived kids living in a third world country. We need to save you.

Fav 8 2059 1097
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT

(813): View more from Florida

Banged my ex-wife last night...so I belong to that club now.

Fav 13 932 701
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT

(386): View more from Florida

well i maturbated this morning, which means the best part of my day has already happened.

Fav 3 338 200
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT