My 12 y/o god son's bandmate just asked me to their school dance. Still he's a better catch than the last one...
the last 2 times weve had drunk sex ive had to get the morning after pill.. he's turning into a real expensive fuck buddy.
idk if ive ever seen a picture of him on facebook with his pants on
just saw someone whip out a flask during lecture... I think I found a study partner
yes you're required to wear a bikini its the snowpocalypse beach party
Let's paint friendship bongs
Your roommate is pacing with a pen in his mouth flapping like a duck. That brownie got me fucked but not enough to understand this. Come back!
He does that
Serious question: Should I volunteer to get tazered? My instincts say no but my wild side says yes.
Boise Idaho, where you have a one night stand with someone from your town 3 states away and run into them the day you return...
New fuck buddy and long time fuck buddy are carpooling home for thanksgiving. #10hrconvoaboutmyblowjobskills
Dude so help me god I WILL weigh a penis one day
I just got a snapchat of a flaccid penis with the caption "happy belated valentine's day." What did I do to deserve this
He told me he loved me...but added "you crazy bitch" at the end. Does it still count???
Drunk me bought a cell phone last week and began texting sober me. The conversation between the two is still on going.
I Never thought my late 30s would end up with me getting eaten out on a desk in the managers office of a lululemon, but I guess being a franchise owner has its perks!
Randomize
