So I pulled my t-shirt down, pushed my boobs up and marched right into that church!
Banned from zoo.
Again?
he was so high, he talked to my goldfish for an hour telling him the dangers of overfeeding.
based on the size of her vibrator, i'm going to be a huge disappointment
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She woke up with blood running down her face and asked the EMS guy where the keg was
I just reenacted what a cuntadactyl would act like by putting straws in my mouth as teeth and roaring, Plz come get me.
Just finished putting caution tape around the tv. Sober me needs to prepare.
could you clean the juice and feathers off my bed I'm just not up for hangover cleaning.
Was almost hungover and got scared, skipped hungover, back to hammered. Fuck real life
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
in the middle of getting head my cat meowed. she looked up , meowed back, and then continued giving me head.
WHY AM I CRAWLING IN OLDER MEN HOLY JESUS
Why wake up next to a guy when you can wake up next to a bag of chips and not have to worry about what kind of std you might've caught
Never go drinking with anime club. End of story.
You're now part of the minority of friends who haven't seen my boobs.
Why is there a business card for people who need bail bonds in my wallet...
Randomize