Question. If Kwik Trip and Kum and Go were to merge, what would they call it? Kwik Kum or Kum Kwik?
so i walked in, looked up the stairs and all i saw was smashed pumpkin, tube socks, and marinara sauce
you left him a drunk voicemail of you singing speechless by lady gaga balling your eyes out
dude, never let a drunk girl playbite your dick. the doctor came in laughed and left.
whispering "taste the rainbow" well having sex isn't my biggest turn on.
Using the ceiling fan to slice the hotdogs in mid-air can only be contributed to our liberal use of 1800.
i think the beer goggles wore off after hearing the story of her 2nd abortion
You carried me up the stairs after I told you not to. And what did you tell me? "Let me test my strengths."
I remember halftime. Then I woke up in Spain. I need a drink in order to process this.
Also the McRib is back. Lets get high, dress like cowboys, and eat some McRibs.
They won't let me buy alcohol in the airport until 9am. Super judgemental
I definitely don't have enough experience with hookers to be in this group text anymore.
It's brunch. If you find dick at brunch. You an A+ hoe.
Where is the baby squirrel I found last night?! I've looked all morning I can't find Morris anywhere did someone take him?? ðŸ˜ðŸ˜
Honey, I kept trying to tell you it was just a pine cone.
You made me promise I wouldnt let you play "fuck fuck goose" with a 40 year old ever again.
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