I actually had to roll up my long sleeves to masturbate. I hate the winter
Instead of just putting in it he asked "will you do the honors?" it was the cutest thing I had ever heard before sex.
There are lots of gay asians. This is better than i was expecting
Why do I feel like the only way for this trip to end is alcohol poisoning?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i yelled at him for a little and we ended up fucking in a random tennis court.
Pre-drinking/conditioning my liver for this impending hurricane party associated with cat. 2 hurricane Irene. Be ready to roll in a weather channel minute.
let's just say if he has a penis and he hypothetically needs to put it somewhere... i would take care of that for him.
no dude I'm not doing anything bad to her...remember she's always the DD she has blackmail material on literally all of us
Apparently I made a stripper cry last night when I paid her $10 to go away
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We're having Wednesday-night goat-night at the bar.
It's hard to explain...
The only thing I like when I am high is sex. And Cheez Its. But mostly sex.
Had to decide between a hook up at the train restroom or getting to work on time #growingup
and then I drunkenly screamed, "you can ride that Uber all the way to revenge city!"
which was funny until I realized I paid for my enemy's cab to go fuck my ex
Woke up with 5 texts apologizing from a number I named "guy who elbowed me in face"
i had sex with a girl named after a fruit last night and it was the best thing to happen to me in 2020
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