I took off my clothes and she wanted to have sex. But then she changed her mind. So we ended up fucking through her panties or something. I don't know it was weird.
How do the people at CVS not know your living in their bathroom?
He might have if you were a little more subtle about your feelings instead of telling everyone multiple times how much you wanted his dick
I'll probably just close my eyes and point to a random name. That will be my vote.
I just realised how much we're failing the women's suffrage movement right now.
Even with having the shower running and music on everyone could hear the alcohol gods making me sacrifice my dignity and meals from the past week.
Pavlovs bj experiment 2012. Welcome to the program.
These people don't understand my stages of drunk
That guy is like a clown car of sexy. Just when I think I've seen it all, THERE'S MORE.
AND SOME IN THE TRUNK.
It started out as friends with benefits and now I'm picking up her kids from daycare...what has happened to me
who are you talking about my vagina to?!
I don't want my vagina anymore.
You know, this is NOT how I pictured my life would be when I was younger, and yet here we are.
He asked if we were going to take advantage of his drunken state. When we said no he tired to show us what we were missing out on. It was so sad it almost made him cute.
you could be the only one getting laid right now....yet your sitting in here making goat noises
You spent the entire night trying to catch pigeons and hugged a homeless guy and then gave him a pregnancy test.
Randomize
