The Redheads category on Pornhub is my number 2 site behind facebook on google chrome. I think I have a problem
The night began with "let go home early so we can study for my 9am final" and ended with "show me your boobs for a free pack of gum".My breasts are worth 14 sticks for a dollar.
God is so good, I would give him a blow job right now.
My doctor just informed me that my food allergies qualify me for a medical marijuana license. I get it on Tuesday. It won't help at all, but my life is awesome!
im just sayin im driving an hr to pick her up, just cause shes your gf doesnt mean i shouldnt be entitled to a bj
Somebody found our where I was and called the bar looking for me. When the bartender called my name I finished my beer and took off like a fugitive.
Yeah... I still gave her a hug because I felt really bad though. I mentioned that my boyfriends grandma just died too, just to reinforce that I'm straight afterwards.
My bank account got hacked so he showed up with a 6 pack wearing a superman cape to cheer me up and you question why I love him?
I stole a tiki torch last night and just returned it. Things have been better.
Now all I want to do is stay up, drink wine, and look at dragons.
I refuse to believe this is a lapse in my dick hunting skills. It's gotta be the gods playing a game.
Don't tell me I can do whatever makes me happy while also saying I have to put on pants.
I turn into such a nice and loving person when I take Vicodin
My manager gave me an envelope with money in it before he had vacation, and when I asked what it was for, he said it will be his bail money.
His relationship is over as soon as he sees my boobs. I’m going to titty fuck my way into his heart
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