Duck Duck Cougar?
half the nation just spent an hour watching a balloon fly around. we are officially the dumbest fucking country.
yea i guess its safe to say fire extinguishers are not synonymous with whip cream cans
Dude, dont worry about the lamb fetus in the fridge.
What?
Just dont open the beer drawer.
I have no idea. Next thing I know we're all down on one knee saying the pledge of allegiance and then singing I'm Proud to be an American. Then Trevor ate pizza off the sidewalk.
ur not supposed to find someone to make out with when ur bf takes u to his SISTERS house to hang out with her and her husband
I tried...failed..now im naked on the futon since clothes are hard.
She was trying to drink out of the beer bong and she thought it didn't work. Little did she know there was no beer in there. Then she got mad at us. Girls.
Everyone heard you scream that I was to be naked, in your bed in 5 minutes. We were one hell of a shitshow spectacle
You came home And decided to make beer battered bacon... That's why there was smoke
Dude, you spit in your shirt pocket saying "I'm saving it for later" then dove head first into the pyramid of beer cans we set up.
So what kind of fun pills do we have for the amusement park tomorrow?
How was my night? He had a picture of his mom on his night stand and he yelled "Papi like" when he came. Fuck tequila.
The part where he comes over and ignores you isn't what makes me mad about that story... It's the fact that he ate your tacos, AND THEN proceeded to ignore you. That's cold hearted.
Its mothers day... Can my present be an orgasm...for once?
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