Do they make some cleansing product for your soul? Like mouthwash that makes you not a skank? Or is that what religions for?
Eh, i think it's called sobriety. But its not fun.
If I say "It's good enough" and I'm not talking about a sandwhich, that's your queue to stop me, you're supposed to be my friend.
watching hot guy on train scrolling with his blackberry's track ball... o to be that track ball...
i hate always having to make my eye shadow look really good since my eyes always end up closed by the end of the night in pics
I got pulled into the conversation by "she sleeps with everybody" then "she" involved sleeping with "cocks the size of a viva burrito"
The bachelorette party was all fun and games until the strippers came. AKA you guys.
I apologize for chief "dances with dolphins" sucking on your friends foot
Who are you to come into MY house and tell me when I can or cannot take my pants off?
This is my punishment for trynna have a festive time with a stranger. I always forget you can't get weird with one night stands
We christened the whole apartment and fucked on the balcony. It was amazing. I'm 100% sure downtown heard me climax. Now we can unpack.
He smells like ham and a lifetime of poor choices
He asked me what I wanted for Christmas. I told him an orgasm would be nice.
So I have now fucked both my roommates...This is why I can’t live with men.
i just went to hell in the tanning bed. i think god is giving me a preview of what is in store if i keep getting drunk everyday.
Well, he pretended he was climbing me like he was a monkey and I was a tree during sex.
I can tell just by looking at the wedding photos that the groom has hooked up with at least three of his groomsmen. I would feel bad for her except that she’s hooked up with two of the same ones.
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