oh, and bring over your fire extinguisher. we're gonna get the mailman again
Just saw a commercial bout this girl that lost 54 lbs on a taco bell diet. so thats my excuse.
i've already watched her fall off the steps, walk up on our porch and try to dance with the dog, and stumble across the street to stand outside the neighbors window...is it taking it too far to watch this rando girl and some guy have sex behind our parking lot now?
He got so drunk that he tried hitting on a girl using nothing but his Samuel L. Jackson soundboard application on his Iphone
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I mean he's a cool ass guy, but he's genuinely in love with a fat chick. I just can't take him seriously as a person.
every time fb tells me a dude i fucked is now friends with another dude ive fucked, i die a little inside. thats way more honesty than im comfortable with.
He said something pertaining to Ragu and vodka I'm worried
The fact that both my ribs are severely bruised from shoving flasks in my bra might be a validation of my mothers alcoholic accusation
just watched a cripple ollie in his wheelchair to get on to the elevated floor in the bar. I. LOVE. WISCONSIN
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Beautiful fucking linguistics Shakespeare, but youre still not doing that to my face
And my only real exposure to Russian culture is you and Internet porn.
What's the address and code again...does anyone need anything and why is my viking helmet on the bed?
Go to a building you've never been before and take a shit. It's marvelous
He told me to leave him behind and bury him in his batman pajamas. So two lessons I guess, don't give Tom whiskey and don't touch his daddy issues with a twenty nine and a half foot pole.
I just punched myself in the vagina to prove a point. Please pray for me.
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