doesn't he have a GF?
that just means you have to try harder.
i didn't have to try TOO hard, just told him i didn't want to know his name or...
Myspace is for pedophiles and tweakers in the 818 trying to hook up. I always forget theres music there too
You remember correctly you did get a golf cart ride out but it wasnt because you were special. You were so smashed you were screaming tiger at random golfers in the middle of there backswing.
like why cant he just admit that he still wants to fuck me even though im underage
She used the introduce me to her roommates so she could find out my name trick the next morning..I may be in love.
No room in fridge, chilling wine in snow. Do NOT let the dog pee on it.
I'm wearing red that night.
Noted, what shade?
Whore.
Reasons why I love cats more than people: 1. They're not fucking people.
We knew we were dealing with a pro when some random guy at the bar thew you over his shoulder and you still didn't spill your drink
Strangely enough, that's not the first time that's happened
The girl I was Skype sexing just asked for a moment of silence for robin Williams.
This German chick looked me up and down for a while. Then she grabbed my crotch, let go after a few seconds, and said "you vill do". I think I'm gonna like tonight.
I WANNA SUCK HIS DICK ON A BOAT
He went down on me while i ate a whole 7/11 pizza. New level unlocked
You had all day to plan ahead & get mixers, so whose fault is this sobriety?
Just because I'm asexual doesn't mean I can't have a revenge fuck.
Randomize
