I just made a friends list on fb of all the guys ive hooked up with. genius.
i gave her road head last night, needless to say it wasn't the same and i bit a chunk of the inside of my cheek off.
I don't know what you told him but please make him stop telling me about his new video camera and winking
Can I just say that you're probably one of my favorite people to have sex with and then eat hummus with at 3:45am?
Lost my virginity dressed as catwoman. He was dressed as batman. Glad I waited.
If I get to the point of singing Man of Constant Sorrow then please god let me do it, record it, then cut me off.
Is it bad to have a craving for speed? I feel like my nose is thirsty.
I told him if he ever gets a "wink" text from me after 10:00pm to assume I really mean "we should be hooking up by 2:30am"
He tried to stop traffic by waving his half eaten pizza at cars.... And we were stupid enough to cross .....??!!!
LMAO I like how "don't worry I'll bring chasers" is your way of assuring things will be ok
I smell like a brewery and I have been drinking for 7 hours. This seems like a perfect time to tell my husband I want a divorce.
Its guy fieris flavor town of suffering™
I have in my possession one ukulele shaped package.
Apparently when cookies are around I think of myself as a puppy and reward myself for everything #WhoIsAGoodBoy
Anyhow. He gives me orgasms and cuddles and buys me dinner and alcohol. Ill keep him around and cross that other girl bridge when we get there ha ha
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