I think the sex offender registry is kind of a VIP list. You get to not live near noisy schools and parks and all your neighbors get to know you.
never have phone sex with a hardcore republican during this health care crisis . just dont.
I mean he's a cool ass guy, but he's genuinely in love with a fat chick. I just can't take him seriously as a person.
watching my parents drink 4 loko out of usf cups playing pool and rocking out to ACDC...
Can I come live with you?
So, how do I go about conveying: I'm sorry, yet very glad she is having my abortion. Via text msg?
and she was grinding on the wall, purring at guys she liked at the pregame...
Thats gotta be it. Also just found out that the fireworks will fit in the airsoft pistols...we are all gonna die
By the way, do you realize that you asked me how much you could get for your eggs last night. And once you learned the price said that you had plenty to share.
HAPPY AIDS-LESS FOURTH OF JULY YOU HEALTHY FUCK
That's what you get for doing kinky shit with a guy that lives in his moms basement.
You humped everything and cried in an uber.
I hope I don't have to wait for another triple crown winner to get laid again.
Was so high at one point last night that while showering I was worried that using too much hot water would slow down our Internet.
whatcha doing?
lying in bed pretending to be a slug
Just got home from work. I'm going to change into sweats for a while before I have to wear normal pants to the party like I promised.
Randomize
