I did the walk of shame to another booty call
I don't think that should turn me on, but it does
Once you see the odd facial expressions and noises a guy makes while he is furiously beating off on top of you, it kind of puts things into perspective.
wasted. watching meteors, awesome idea i ever had, see 2 for every 1 with ma double vision
Good to know: if a hot girls asks to go back to my place, she probably just needs to vomit all over my bathroom
just got carried INTO the bar by 4 people. it's like watching my weekend in reverse.
He also has a monumental penis. It's unbelieveable. I'm sorry but he's perfect.
Maybe its all the xanax she takes but she literally has NO shame
You know just sitting here carrying on a conversation with a 5 yr old about why there is puke at the landing of the staircase
do you know how hard it is to walk a mile drunk on 151 it's hard yards are soft and every girl looks good
I think this girl gave me a handjob thinking that I would help her with her cell phone bill
omg. that's awesome
I woke up in an apt hallway this morning and a nice lady brought me coffee cause she thought I was homeless
did you just say you're too stoned to fool around? okay we're over.
What happened to no more shots?
It went out the window just like my dreams
Okay first of all, that is a sick ass nickname please call me that forever. Second, i need your help.
My pizza delivery guy was so hot I was like omg please let this be the beginning of a porno
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