too bad they don't have a 'people you may be able to do' thing on facebook. it would save me a lot of fucking time.
you should buy a sheep. A) you get an awesome pet. B) free coat
By the way, I think my next facebook status update will read, "Aaron recently found out Vanessa's a screamer."
oh god.
At Wal-Mart last night I watched two guys scramble for $4.34 to pay for a pack of ping pong balls and red solo cups. They had to put the .34 on a credit card. Winter break begins!
She told me I reminded her of the fair. And she wanted to deep fry my dick and eat it.
My family just legit passed around a fifth of Maker's Mark. Also, this is sort of a Thanksgiving tradition. Also, Maker's Mark is really good.
I don't see what kind of idea someone could get from an envelope covered in jesus stickers and a note from a person and their dog. I'd say crazy person alert before flirting.
oh and speaking of men I've slept with. Ryan lost 1/3 of a testicle zip lining
I convinced every single one of my cousins to bring me a glass of wine. I was the alcoholic queen and they were my subjects.
Somehow he made it really romantic
He came on your tits... That doesn't scream romance to me.
You realize we were screaming in the car about our apartment next year because we can "bring home randoms whenever we want" and "stare at each other from our door ways"
So I just got drugs from a house with a giant cross on it. Thank you, Jesus.
So baked. About to eat a calzone then hate fuck this guy.
THAT'S MY GIRL
Of course i made out w him. He was painted green. You know of my secret longing for the Hulk.
Well my parents know I get medical Cannabis they saw me on the news at the dispensary
Randomize
