think what you will about my sexuality, just get the cigarettes
now i know why they say having sex with her is the equivalent to licking a pay phone
Sometimes I get depressed that my son is too young to understand how hot his babysitter is.
I was about to go down on her and her dong flopped out and hit me in the chin. This may have a Nam like post-traumatic-stress-disorder effect on me.
This frat boy drinking a forty and wearing a pussy patrol shirt just ran out in front of my car. I should have used less brakes.
Is all white too much for court to prove my innocents?
why oh why did i suck thise tits. nothing but trouble fuuuuuu
Guess who won bingo at the senior center and is going to jail all in the same night?
She said she was jealous that i could wear headbands, then growled at the ground in shame..
I was hoping for a marriage proposal... Or at least an offer to sleep in his bed.
fuck off. It's 10am and I'm drink gin and ginger ale through a twizzler straw. My life is marvellous
He plays guitar, sings like an angel, and acts like a gentleman. If I don't fuck him by the end of first semester, I'm dropping out
I use my feet as sexual weapons
First she snuck beer into the movies and then proceded to give me a handjob in the dark theatre. I think I'm in love
What happened?
Vodka. Vodka happened.
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