Gonna get hammered and start online dating men in prison. But... only the ones who get out within two years.
Girl's gotta have her standards.
no, its his 'welcome back from rehab' party.
And my awkwardness continues. I felt the need to send him a text that said roar. I did it.
today was the first day of rush. talking to girls all day makes me sick of having a uterus.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm really tired of cleaning up my twitter the morning after
Uh oh. Middle aged belly dancers. And they just got out swords. Shit is about to get real.
She screams like she's just fallen out of a helicopter when she cums.
Being invited to eat tater tots at 1:30am by a rly hot girl then actually only eating tater tots is a major let down. Tasty, but still a let down
I had to physically pry the rocks out of your hands so you wouldn't throw them at the guy with the cowboy hat. You probably would've missed anyways.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's not an office Christmas party until your boss confesses his undying love for your boyfriend...
I mean we don't talk anymore but I still see him around wearing that sweater he stole from me after we had sex
I'm sorry I called your mother a reasonably-priced receptacle.
Who brings a stripper home to ninja turtle bed sheets
Me and I got head
I just had the polyamorous Canadian hockey player do the splits while naked in a handstand at my apartment just now. And yes, I know it’s 1:30am on a Thursday.
Hypothetically speaking of course, is it bad if a cat eats lube?
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