I think my emotional moodswings have reached a new low. I cried for the entire duration of changing my tampon.
I didnt pay $190 for a fake with a new middle name of Vane..
IM SAVING ALL MY LOVE FOR YOU
I don't want it.
im contemplating emailing my dad and telling him how worthless i am and how sorry i am that he pays for my life...aka my bar tabs.
I am intoxicated and cannot bring you a burrito. However, if you want to bring ME one...
Breaking hearts and overdosing on semen. That's my life.
I just watched a woman in a full wedding dress and veil walk out of the chinese buffet...I no longer believe I have a problem, and am afraid I am underdressed.
we should hire that guy that makes pancakes that we met last weekend for our next party. He can feed us, and regulate!
If you hook up with your cousin you will permanently be my favorite person ever.
I just had to dig under a pile of condoms in my desk drawer to get to a blue book. Summer is officially over.
One of the art pieces was basically this chick throwing raw meat at the audience, anyone who got hit (which I did) got a free shot of whiskey. It was worth it.
Lol no. She's home safe. You forget she is too pretty to get arrested.
We're fucking and Lee Greenwood God Bless the USA comes on and he came. It was the most Roll Tide America moment of my life.
I just sustained a forearm injury dancing to salt n peppa in my kitchen. Fack. I pushed it real good.
I'm gonna give the church their tithe, and the rest is a down payment on boobs.
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