i'm not sure what happened. i know i woke up on the floor of his bathroom, then had morning sex with him. dont remember getting to his apt. dont remember much.
morning sex?... maybe not a total mistake then? he seems like a normal person, so rare at BU
oh no, he's far from normal. i know his high school girlfriend. she's CRAZY. and he definitely deals prescription drugs. also. he had sex with me even though i slept on his bathroom floor.
She invited me to an Eagles game, I mean that is almost better then if she told me she could only function with large amounts of semen in her system at all times.
Wydf in so deruk i just dowwned a packet if salt waitibg for food at del taco
The mass text at 3:12AM offering "free scrotum tastings" will have repercussions
i just saw you make out with a girl with facial hair...just thought i would document that in case you forgot
Drunk in a canoe getting pulled by a lawnmower thinking of you
You know whats not fun? Making yourself throw up on a sand dune at 4 in the morning.
Also, not pregnant! Way to go uterus! Good job on being a team player!
Every single person in dollar tree stares at you if you are buying a pregnancy test and wearing a charlie brown costume. Just FYI.
Maybe there is a secret pocket full of cocaine in that spiderman wallet.
You shall now refer to my vagina as patty and patty only
Well, maybe we can talk about it over a drink and some crushed up vicodin.
I'd say it's his fault for never running us through proper protocol for "catching your RA in the middle of him banging some girl"
I sent you a snap of me in the bath, and you sent me a snap of a taco. An actual taco.
You were in no condition to manage a 3-way.
Randomize
