dont try to nair your balls. i speak from experience
The musician playing at the bar just puked inside his acoustic guitar, then sang an encore performance. I love Louisa!!!!
Throw up on the ground, people dancing to loud Bollywood music, seats literally missing. Fuck I hate public transit
And on top of all this... he just told me to "chill my nips."
TOMORROW NIGHT CAN I HOLD YOU LIKE A BABY
I feel like everytime I call him he's either fucking or getting into trouble. It's really disturbing that he presses the answer button and then proceeds to fuck her harder.
she visited to give me a bj between clients. Social work at its finest.
Cockoligist
Yes, one may refer to me as that.
I should make business cards.
I had sex for the second time today and ate an entire bag of alligator jerky on the way home. These truly are the golden years.
I literally paid cover, got kicked out. Tried to explain that I was just clumsy, but mispronounced it. Then I got pissed off, stormed out..and clotheslined myself on a velvet rope. How was your night?
Let's play the game let's see how long Kayla can be sober
But of course I'm in. After all, what fun would the holidays be without trying to find the perfect gift to impress someone you've never met, but need the approval of??
If walking through the neighborhood with a bottle of tequila and margarita mix is postgrad life, I'm okay with it
she filled my toilet with birdseed... i tried flushing it but now it's clogged so she has to come over and fix it because it was her mistake in the first place
It's a draw. You need to settle it in Smash, Soul Calibur, and/or rock-paper-scissors, the last of which Steve claims is bullshit.
Randomize
