Apparently they shut down a cook out cause people were selling drugsout the drive thru. Nice to be home
so he expects you to be his vegas whore for the season. nice.
Apparently Chef Boyardee is the only guy I'm taking home tonight.
dude that girl has seen more cock ends then weekends
There was a lot of him and a little penis
That's the first time you've ever said the L word without referring to drinking or partying.
Lesson learned. Whipped cream will eat through a condom.
The swelling on my elbow and tongue means I may have cockblocked myself.
Just bought a beer belt to complete the Captain America outfit. I will do my part as a hero of America to pass out beer to the good citizens of America.
Dave when you find that upper decker at your house its from me but its for Jill not you
think I signed up for a 5k last night while blackout.
Do you think you could handle being our babysitter if we roofied ourselves for fun??
Came back with a random sweatshirt, an American flag, and a for sale sign. Mission success?
Got to work this morning and thought... Did I really dance on that pole last night
Ugh im hungover from last night, and to top it all off, I think someone jacked my laptop.
umm ya, so we found it in the oven wrapped in a pillow case this morning
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