I reminded them that I didn't puke and I cleaned yours up! So huh!
using no condom is gross. my vagina has a dress code.
Judging by what's in the bathroom right now, I see you graced us with your presence last night.
just added God to my list of friends who can only see my limited profile on facebook. its such a relief to know that He can't watch me fuck up my life anymore.
why is there a clump of hair nailed to my wall?
I know. he thinks we're 'meant to be'. No we're fucking not. God wouldn't give my soulmate a pencil dick.
So are you actually going to come fuck me in the ass this weekend, or was that just you being drunk in a kilt?
That feeling when you're ready to convert to the religion of whatever god will stop the vomit. Dynamite is illegal.
omg his dad is hot
... I'm currently away at the moment. Leave a msg since I cannot express how much I can't help you stop ruining peoples lives.
I'm more worried that you thought licking a pole on Bourbon street would turn me on
saw a dude wearin soccer cleats at the bar tonight. fuckin kiddin me man?
I'd just like to inform you. That when I was at bvj the first day I was blackout drunk by noon. Get on past Chelsea's level like now. Do it for present Chelsea
And by not handle it I mean it makes me want to sit on his face
Pretty sure I got at least one girl to question her sexuality at the Christmas party last night
I just got a hug from a random kid in my class. he said I was a champ at the bar last night..someone help me.
Randomize
