Keeping hand sanitizer and lube in the same drawer in the same size bottle = awful idea
anyone who buys me chipotle gets an automatic hj
just broke no shave november. hello backed up drain december.
we're at Rob's house and just invented the best drinking game ever....we are on Chatroulette and everytime we see a dick we all have to drink.
You guys seriously fuck to bieber? That's embarrassing...
i've never seen someone face fit so perfectly in a toilet bowl
Pretty much gone. He was in the backseat and kept whispering that his "toes felt like pigtails"
Took me 12 hours to be sober again. Shitshow mission accomplished
Just for future questioning, I didnt break up with you over text
I JUST MADE OUT WITH A BRITISH SOCCER PLAYER. LONG LIVE THE QUEEN. GOD BLESS THAT COUNTRY.
I just think his face would be more attractiveif it was framed by my thighs
Gotta get new sheets. ..I fucked the satin off mine.
It's the kind of dick you travel across the country for
Don't tell me I can do whatever makes me happy while also saying I have to put on pants.
You make me want to do things that I'm pretty sure are illegal.
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