She's hot, in a Megan Fox with Down's Syndrome kinda way. Like, she'd win Miss Deliverance Pageant
At least she's the hottest one. Oh well, it's all about stats
I never doubt that you might be drinking at any moment.
so when she was in the shower, I took a pic of my dick with her phone and sent it to her brother saying, this just fucked your sister
you should have heard her the other night. no sentence related to one preceding it. it was like she was in etch a sketch and when she moved she forgot everythin
I pulled out and her Nuva ring was around my dick... It was like I won a carnival game for adults... I asked her where my big stuffed bear was
Hey. I found $5 in quarters from one of those state quarter collection books. I'm using it for food tomorrow.
She introduced herself and then asked "have you ever fucked a girl with a cast?"
We can talk tomorrow when we're both alert. My mind is somewhere else right now.
Where's it at?
In your pants.
Their house warming gift for us was a half case of keystone and getting the cops called..
so im sitting outside the gym eating a 20 piece nugget stoned out of my mind, convincing myself this is more productive because im so close to the treadmills.
I'd say I'd distract him, but I lose my psychic powers when guys get girlfriends. And by psychic powers I mean taking off my top.
Thanks for fucking me in last night
TUCKING. TUCKING ME IN LAST NIGHT
Any recommendations for how to tell your wife about the pics of her 19 yr old sister on a porn site without admitting you were surfing said porn site?
Like, I want sex but I also would be okay with Netflix
I think I'm pregnant again.
or as we call it, thursday.
Randomize
