I'm lost and stupid without you.
I would have at least made out with you if you were showered.
wtf he couldnt undo my bra, i asked him if it was his first time and he said "with a girl? yeah"
Question: terrible or awesome when a girl give you head so vigorously that you get a hickey of sorts
I'm watching Cheaper By The Dozen. I almost forgot that Hilary Duff was a really shitty actor before she was a really shitty singer.
We eventually had to ration the melon vodka. 10 pushups per shot. THATS why my arms hurt
I put a toilet paper roll with my number on it by his face... hooking up is not happening
idk. I was on the deck with Dominic and i felt something weird on my arm. I looked down and you were licking my elbow.
Her voice kills me. Its the perfect pitch to fuck with my hangover.
It's official, I need to start putting my vagina's needs before my own.
My last two google searches are "shiny things" and "Ohio consent laws." you should visit more often.
This is what my life has come to. Like, I may or may not have just stolen pizza from the guy I just hooked up with's fridge when I left...
just because the DWI class is located at the University does not make him a professor. I was duped, he is in no way, shape or form a professor!
I'M WORRY THAT MY VAGINA WILL NEVER KNOW THE TOUCH OF A MAN AND YOU ARE MAKING A MIXTAPE
Haha holy fuck. i dont remember much after pissing on your ex's flaming nude pics.
Randomize
