Did you see the soccer ref give that girl the red card as she was being kicked out of the party?
I just speedwalked down the broken metro escalator while high. Basically all my worst fears combined
i was so blacked out at my family party.. my mom gave markers to all my little cousins. i was tagged by 5 year olds.
FYI angry masturbation is not as cool angry sex
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I don't want to talk about her cat for two hours only to dry hump till I'm blistered. Not worth it.
We can't bring brittanys dog so we are getting high and getting in my bathtub I think it's pretty safe
Somewhere along the night we ended up at a food lion giving jello shots to high school girls.
As long as you're naked and covered in glow paint, I'm there.
i'm soo broke, the only trip i can afford for spring break is acid
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yeah dropping that class because i really don't want to be known as the girl who fell asleep in class and threw up as she walked out for an entire semester
When you and Blake get an apartment I want you to buy this Costco couch I'm currently passing out on.
Can you bring me a corn dog or something shaped like one?
The girl next to me looks like the young version of sara (bonnie hunt) in jumanji. I wanna be like PLAY THE GAME SARA!!!!"
lesson learned. Never drop acid before a trip to the aquarium. Sounds awesome, is actually terrifying.
Also I feel I should tell you last night when I came home I fell into my laundry hamper and woke up in a pile of my clothes
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