bar tonight had a doorbell to get in and last night i saw my neighbors fuck on the balcony, she wore a nurse outfit. Missouri isn't so bad...
I've been awake for 20+ hrs. What does that mean? I just realized if BSB were Twilight characters, Brian would be Jake and Howie would be Edward based on the video for "Everybody". That's unsettling.
It's unsettling that you took the time to think about that.
Kay wants to put chicklets in our cooters to make beavers and take pix captioned Got Wood? Taking public transit does scary things to her.
What am I legally allowed to do to a girl that is the equivalent of me punching her in the face?
I'm handcuffed to the toilet. Don't ask
i gave her a can of corn and told her the cabs are accepting non perishable food items over the holidays. blatant lie and she lives like $40 away
Ok see being that I'm not present or participating your vague texts "neeeeed that" and "vagina" leave a lot to question.
I have no idea what to do about this. He has a power over me and I think its called his tongue.
the tv said "its small, its comfortable..." and i started laughing... safe to say he lost any dignity he had left...
She got turned on by my fanny pack full of condoms. I can't believe you said it was a bad idea to wear it to the party.
I made the jerking off hand motion to my mother by accident this morning. It was awkward for everyone involved.
I'm going to smoke the pathetic stems and miscellaneous particles that weren't good enough for all my other bowls because its all I have left. This is my bag's Rudy moment.
cops tried arresting me on the way to class this morning.. this is my life.
who is that guy in your bed? he looks like jesus..way to keep it festive
still not dressed at 5:00, jacking off watching men's figure skating and hoping my weird roommate doesn't walk in. anybody who says idk how to have fun is wrong
Randomize
