You dropped me off at the wrong girl's house.
There's no such thing as a "wrong girl" make it happen.
alright see you in the morning.
Is it weird i consider You Sexy Thing our song?
so i walked in, looked up the stairs and all i saw was smashed pumpkin, tube socks, and marinara sauce
i would totally change schools right now just to be that new girl everyone wants
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I threw up red last night... I wanted to pinch myself because it wasn't green.
Dude, at this rate we're going to get arrested a second time tonight.
You're the only person i know who can laugh and talk while puking
Just flooded the bathroom while masturbating in the shower. Managed to squeege most of it up. Desperately need to get laid.
Hes screaming about Slender man. whatever hes on is probably not healthy.
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Not sure if you carved a butthole or vagina in that pumpkin but that didn't stop high Phil from mounting. My study group is horrified.
Dude. There's gotta be an article in Cosmo about it cause I've had three different girls tongue tickle my brownie this month.
He better not be in your backpack
I'm so hungover. I just keep eating the otter pops I'm trying to use to get rid of my hickies.
I don't care how hot she is, her cat has pissed on me twice.
Sometimes the gods of alcohol choose to take you on a mysterious journey and you just have to go with it