are you so shy because you have an std?
fuck. did you have to draw it on me with a permanent marker
I was watching truelife I'm transgendered. This tranny already got a date a week after getting a vagina. I've had a vagina my entire life and can't get a date.
I'm celebrating tres de junio so if you can help me find some sombreros ill be grateful. Also, today in 1992 Aborigines were granted rights to their land so I might need some boomerangs.
Don't blame the cocaine for your eating disorder.
She's good at three things and two of them involve dicks. And other one involves her love for arts
i just masturbated in footie pajamas. there's no judgement here.
Sober me does NOT approve of what went on in my pants last night.
Come on. I'll make you hot pockets. Literally and sexually.
Some kid just stopped wherever he was walking, turned to me, and gave me a slow clap. So I'm pretty sure my walk of shame beats yours.
The only thing left on my Bucket List is getting fingered at an aquarium.
I mean. I just want to sit in my bed and eat bagels. What's wrong with that?
Last time I "ran into him" I ended up with the clap and had to explain why the ladder was missing from the garage.
are you still up? I want to use you for sexual things. you have 35 minutes to respond to this offer.
I mean, drunk me really liked him, maybe sober me will too. Who am I to deny fate?
Randomize
