Woke up this morning at my parent's house. No idea how I got here... what happened last night? Was it bad?
We using my standards or yours?
I knew you were gonna be a good wingman when the words "dibs on the chunky one" came out of your mouth.
Why is it that you only get to have sex when you haven't shaved your legs in six weeks and are wearing period stained granny panties?
There is a keg full of gin. THERE SHOULD NEVER EVER BE A KEG FULL OF GIN.
His whole family saw that I had cum in my hair once they turned on the blacklight at the bowling alley. You should have seen his mother's face.
my mom took me to a gay bar and went on and on about all her good times at clubs... i now know where i get it
so just saw tiger woods pull a page out of his wifes book and hit some kid in the head with a golf club
Hannah wants to know if she cant borrow your stats notes because she threw up on hers.
found out that hot proper business chick in my class A) did a bar crawl last 2 night and still showed up to class and B) is 19 and C) so not as proper as I thought D) is single. How the fuck does that work? Freaking superwoman.
I found your wallet in my underwear drawer......... Don't worry I don't plan on asking any questions
I want to respect them as people, but really I just want to have sex with them.
She dated an Australian guy or some dude with an accent. Normal guys don't stand a chance.
CHALLENGE ACCEPTED.
i have a lot of questions about the picture quality/lighting/motion/gravity of the balls...
he had a cock ring. i orgasmed before he even put it in
it was like 6 shots in and he was automatically my type
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