Yah man, that place is surreal
Man, I'm from Tennessee. What the fuck is surreal?
This isn't the rejection hotline, is it?
I called the bar to ask if they found my Id and credit card and they remembered me as 'the girl who signed her receipt in blood'
We decided to smoke and then made crosses on our foreheads for ash wednesday
mom would be proud
we just did breakfast shots, I have a black eye and savage garden is on . Best weekend ever
I bet they don't have a scenario slide on how to deal with a suggested three way with counsel during harassment training.
So at what point do I tell her that I like fucking these hot southern girls more than I like my relationship with her?
Alright, so what's my next move? I already posted a Milli Vanilli video on her wall
Just found out my ex boss was running a whore house in the bar. Time to remove her as a reference?
No, I know her type. Tall, lanky, uses teeth when giving head, and runs like a giraffe. Don't do it man..
one minute he's happily playing with a lighter and the next thing I know, he's screaming and the swing set is on fire
Nothing says "we're never gonna bone" like "nice haircut, it makes you look like my cousin"
Lemme put it this way babe, at point you were naked in Target.
Where were you?
Laughing
Well puke fest 2014 just happened
Are you coming over for scrambled eggs and hand jobs?
Randomize
