you didnt say anything until i brought it up today. i guess i misjudged your maturity.
I guess I misjudged your gender.
this girl walked outta his room as i was walkin in to scottys and i just say " time for the walk of shame baby! whoooo!". she ran away
I want to spend time with you, and by time, I mean real time. Not your dick in my mouth time.
Got free coffee because I told the guy at starbucks the pleats in his khaki pants made his cock look big.
Dude their dog does tricks for sips of beer. He keeps going up next to people and trying to shake. This is awesome.
Listen. I'm a changed woman. I have no problem using him for sex.
Is it sad that i just saw my moms thumb on the table & i instinctively put mine down cuz i thought she was thumbmaster?
He made me write my name on his wall in crayon so he'd be able to remember it in the morning
Fulfilled a bucket list goal last night. Borrowed a dollar from a stripper to buy smokes
God bless Atlanta.
So I'm guessing that puking on a camper is a straight path to instant termination?
Sorry I sent you a video of a singing reverend last night, I was really high.
The shrooms have turned on carrie. Change of plans. We're getting stoned and finding bacon.
I need you there. I need someone to glance at when other people inevitably annoy me.
SHE'S PREGNANT AS SHIT, AND I JUSR PEELED A CLEMENTINE TO CHASE SHOTS WITH!! COULD LIFE GET ANY BETTER!?
Look, all I'm looking for is a good time and someone whose chest I can bury my face in
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