I can get head just about anywhere nowadays so that's not much of an incentive, coffee on the other hand...
Only your wife would write 'for deposit only' on the back of that $1500 check knowing full and well our capabilities of spending it on strippers and booze
I can't even use my hands i'm so hungover
Chicken salad taco, you know, when you're out of bread and crackers, and high.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we're like Indians of the 21st century. trading not for food and survival but personal gain and by trouble you mean getting daytime drunk and going to the roller ring then yes.
how much ball-pain constitutes an emergency?
I'm never drinking with you again. I woke up in Midtown with a 7' tall Norwegian rugby player named Lexie. Never. Again.
In the pie chart of my life, she is a huge part of why I drink.
It's no longer hooking up, we have definitely graduated to Sport Fucking....
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That moment when your fucking in an airport bathroom and forget to lock the door. That poor man...scarred forever...
Her ass is the reason I still believe in a higher power
I didn't know how wild the party was going to be until one girl brought her pet raccoon
PUT DOWN THE JOINT AND STEP AWAY FROM THE TRUSTAFARIAN
All I'm saying is Europe has not been easy on my vagina.
We were fucking in the bedroom then we heard Sports center on in the living room. He stopped midfuck when I started celebrating that my team won over his
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