spencer pratt says his family invinted chess
that kid is like the al gore of hollywood.
Showering in the handicapped shower. Im THAT hungover.
It was the gentlest way I could hit on a girl who just got hit by a car
It's hard to believe so much cum came out of such a small penis.
I CAME AT YOU WITH RAW FEELING
you grabbed my dick through my pants and hissed at me.
Get out here. Doing shots with the delivery guy. Also, the food is here
I never knew so many sexual things could be done while wearing footie pajamas
Drinking franzia alone at noon watching a cheese themed episode of "The Chew" I'm ready to admit I need a job.
BTW waking up to a picture of you taking a shot of what I can only assume was shitty lukewarm liquor out of a blow up dolls butt made my day
Just rinsed and put my styrofoam cup of noodles in the dishwasher. I need to be not hungover ASAP
i need to stop celebrating other people's birthdays like they are m own.. my body can't handle a birthday every week
Do I need to call and sing lullabies? Because that's creepy, but I'm a really good friend.
Mark my words I will never date another cop again. I don't care if he's JESUS.
Hey, you should go to your facebook ASAP... i'm guessing you're wasted but you just uploaded a picture of someones dick...and everyones taking bets now if its Rick or Mikes..
I think I kinda scared him when I tried to wrap his snake around his dick while he was trying to nap.
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