Im glad youre not pregnant with that New Jersey assholes baby. Your vagina would have smelled worse than Newark.
It was amazing what she could do with her one good arm.
Whatever. We're stealing a penguin. Your not allowed near him... You did this to yourself.
i'm in workout clothes. this is progress.
just tell her a well fed dog doesnt stray far from the porch, and if that doesnt work just keep fucking her sisters
my nipple ring is gone but someone was nice enough to replace it with a paperclip
Can you tell me how this chicken finger got in my pillow case?
yes, i was eatting raw cookie dough and fingering myself at the same time.... is there a problem?
That feeling when you're ready to convert to the religion of whatever god will stop the vomit. Dynamite is illegal.
If you take a post shower shit just get back in bed. You're better off starting your whole morning all over again.
Know what I do when I'm in that mood? Whenever anyone talks to me I just hiss like a cat. They go away.
I'm about to play another round of who's panties are in my car.
just curious, were the inflatable penis' received? Amazon says they were delivered.
From now on he's gonna have to shave first. It feels like I got eaten out by a chainsaw!
I couldn't find my contact solution so I thought mixing toothpaste and water would work
Randomize
