Dude?? where did you go after Wildcats last night? Last I heard you went off with one of the girls we danced with?
Negative - This is his GF, Bobby is in Jail for a DUI. Thanks for the info.
When we talk. Remind me of these topics, photoshop, my bday, threesomes, and cherekee indians. I swear these are real topics...
New topics to add when we talk, sweden, boxing, and the band journey
Dude. Fucked her last night. Fucked her this morning. went downstairs for water. took 18 pack of Coors Light instead and took it back to my gf's. Got a blow job from her. Drinking the beer on my deck now. Best Day ever.
i just did my hair and make up to walk our dogs.. I hate being the single roommate
Sundays have taken on a whole new meaning when I'm not in bed with an excruciating hangover.
i woke up this morning next to my toilet covered in an attempt to make blanket of toilet paper
It was huge And he was twirling it around. Im telling you, beautiful wonderpenis
theres still like 7 beers in the gutter from the roof party we had last night. i dont know how we got up there. but we need to get those beers down.
She's been drinking and was roller blading. I'm sure you can do the math
My aunt comes over, haven't seen her in 4 years. First thing, looks me up and down and goes "...yup, that pair ripened nicely. Theyll get you some free drinks"
I think you were raised by the wrong sister
im trying to look as sober as possible but i just poured orange juice and mayo into my milkshake.
The joke is on me because whale penis is forever in my search history.
Worth it.
I think snapchat is trying to tell you something. It's saying your boobs were meant to be seen by his family.
I don't want my liquor store dad to judge me...
On a scale from 1 to 10 how gross is it to get a chili dog from a vending machine?
Randomize
