why does he think he needs to feed/take me out to get some ass? we are at a bar wasting my fucking time
the liability waiver did not state that i couldn't bring my bottle of wine in the bouncy castle. it did Not.
BROstal carolina. Watching a boy drinking rum and coke out of a cup of noodle empty cup.
You hooked up with 4 random girls, avoided your grilfriend finding out about it, and dodged traffic on Park Ave. Can you say luck of the Irish?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just ran into a kid I used to hook up with while wearing his shirt. Only me. I tried to pretend like it wasn't his but it said his name on the back so I wasn't winning that.
i just ate a whole pizza and threw it back up in the time span of 13 minutes. give me the number to guiness book of world records.
he was grinding on you and dedicated the song "I'm in Love With a Stripper" to you then started taking his own clothes off
sleeping in bed with your booty calls married sister...you're the stuff heroes are made of.
White people are beatboxing! Save me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We play beat the clock every morning. When the alarm goes off, she hits snooze and drops her panties. If I can't finish in time to beat the snooze, she jumps in the shower and I've gotta jerk off.
Where are you? Your parents are here. Their flight got in early.
Trashy Tequila Tuesdays. Have them meet me here @ the bar.
I'm not sending your parents to see you drunk at a gay bar. What kind of boyfriend do you think I am?
A great one. Entertain them i'll be home soon....... I think
I can't go to class, I have all this weed to sell
I love you but this is the first Saturday I have ever spent at the police station. And where are my boxers?
he's annoying when i'm sober but vaguely hot when i'm drunk so yes i do have a preference and it goes by the name of vodka
i'll...probably just offer you drugs?
i'll...probably take them in all honesty
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