and trust me i need no booty pop lessons
You ordered a "mcblizzard" and yelled @ the worker for false advertisement because she didn't flip your "mcblizzard" upsidedown. You wanted it free. I'd say mcdonalds daytime workers need to be trained in dealing with daytime drunks too. She didn't know what to do.
It started as a joke and ended with a trip to the emergency room, a broken macbook and a gigantic hole in the concrete of my driveway.
did you really just send me an instagramed dick pic?
just peed in rthe mens room but seranaeded them with adelle the whole timee so they didnt mind
attractive or not, he has more than one book on serial killers. i'm gonna get out of here while i can
That's the only way to get approved without a guarantor.
WHAT DOES THAT MEAN WHAT FUCKING LANGUAGE ARE YOU SPEAKING
he told me he had a dream that he laid his head in my lap and silently gazed up at me. WHY AM I ALWAYS THE DUDE IN RELATIONSHIPS
All I've done for this 11 hour car ride is kegel and listen to our sex playlist so your dick better be good and ready
I sent a picture of my balls to one of my best friends, so basically it was an average night.
I WOULD NEVER MIX DICK AND MCDONALDS
I paper cut my nipple reading mail topless
"You can have sex in my class, just stay quiet. I don't like noise." My professor... Shall make for an interesting semester.
I think I may have gotten way too used to using my boobs as an extra hand/pocket...almost stabbed myself in the chin bc I forgot I put my fork there
Who did he bring home?
Idk. But did you see her shoe choice by the stairs, I'm really not expecting anything great.
Randomize
