Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(908): View more from New Jersey

The whole way homeyou were flapping your arms up and down, and when I asked why you said you were trying to tell Tony Danza about the angels.

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(847): View more from Illinois

His internet history had "Disney Porn" on it.

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(832): View more from Houston, Texas

I had to call maintenance to come unclog the toilet.

(347): View more from New York

Something to remember me by.

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(785): View more from Kansas

Seriously he's so hot. And it's so hard to flirt with a deaf guy

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(801): View more from Utah

Printed off fake 'Producer' Sundance badges for us. Pretty sure they double as free passes for getting laid by 'actresses'. Testing this theory tonight.

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(208): View more from Idaho

If court goes my way we are flying to Vegas.

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(260): View more from Indiana

One time she made a chronological chart for the guys she has given blow jobs to, I shit you not.

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(306): View more from Saskatchewan

sorry there isn't a 'perfect ass' emoji

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(631): View more from New York

How did people get blow jobs before text messaging?

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