We are so in love
so when's the next time you get to see your balls
She rubs her butt on the bed & then she growls..
Some fat girl belted her graduation gown. That is not a good look for anyone.
I wouldn't accept the money so he folded the $20 bill into an origami puppy and left a note saying "Not blowjob money"
It was awkward being the only one at the wedding who knows that the bride and groom met when she gave him a lap dance at a strip club
Just charged fat mistake $3 for a beer.
You puked on my feet last night. You owe me a pedicure.
BTW the amount of schmoozing I am doing towards some guy for an ID that may or may not look like you... You better love me.
I told the cop to try walking in heels and he'd understand why I was walking home without then on. He told me he only does that on Wednesdays.
Alive.
So much puke
Some male strippers are here, I threw pancakes at them. It's ok
Ok. As long as I can keep Kevin contained to the room I'll be ok. If not u might have a naked puking Kevin at ur door
I should know better than to open your texts at the grocery store
i need something from you. video yourself doing naked jumping jacks and send it to me. it will make me smile
just licked whipped cream off some model's nipple... just coming clean for when the pic gets on instagram because i am not untagging that shit
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