Damn I can't remmbre the last tome I had sobr sex
Um. I believe with my boyfriend, slut
Fuck. Wron person. But yea
you dont seem to understand my overwhelming need to watch space jam right now
my 12 year old sister just told me how admirable it was that i felt comfortable going out with my friends dressed "like that"
Why is there a case of Coors Light with my address on it?
some random kid just walked into our apartment with two cases... I don't know who he is but I like him
I need to shower. I still have paint on me from the homeless guys
this will be a night to untag.
One of the bamboo sticks broke and impaled him. I think he's drunk enough that it shouldn't hurt until tomorrow.
He met a random girl on the bus home and decided to go to Spain with her. The blackout decisions are becoming internationally epic. He has work in the morning.
Already at the river; already getting fucked up. And yes that semicolon is legit because those are congruent statemests
When was the last time you wore pants?
Time is relative.
And pants are optional.
I could tell my life story through kermit memes
She rode me wearing nothing but a Santa hat. Merriest fucking Christmas!
I'm literally the definition of crunk, sunburnt, and dehydrated. I'm going to die tomorrow.
First she snuck beer into the movies and then proceded to give me a handjob in the dark theatre. I think I'm in love
Randomize
