At least we lost an hour tonight! Less time to make a fool of myself
I don't think anyone has ever said "boy I'm glad I took those shots of everclear" when they wake up
stripped for him at 3am on my childhood playground and used the swing set as a pole.
well my dad not being home definitely made it less awkward to walk in carrying the bra I left wearing.
Hey history final, how's it feel to be raped in the ass by my steel cock of ACADEMIC PERFECTION?
you are way too vulgar to be a girl
A kid in my class today just asked if we have class on the 17th, then announced that he couldn't go anyways because it was the day after his 21 and he was going to be too hungover
We lost power at midnight which freaked out my roomate and friends. The power came back on 30 minutes later. We are now at the bar having "the rapture came and we were left behind" shots
There really needs to be a redbox for wine because I want some but too lazy to walk into a store
I think the "tmi" ship sailed a long time ago, and it took our dignities with it..
After I was kicked out of the last frat I blacked out, woke up in the hospital with no clothes no phone and no idea what happened last night. But i got hospital socks, thats a win in my book.
Its a holy bong. We had to bless the holy bong water.
I tried to open a bottle of wine with toenail clippers last night. So this morning was obviously rough.
Don't try to sleep with work colleagues because he won't be able to get it up and you won't be able to look him in the eye ever again
Ok you had this coming you put a sponsored filter on a dick pic
There will be bowls smoken and not a single fuck will be given.
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