I Once took so much Ecstacy that I tried to hug a fire.
He's a collector of sorts
Any cool stuff?
You should see the collection of booggers in the carpet next to his desk
she works at a police station now. i think thats the definition of keeping your enemies closer.
Wow, I just sneezed gum out of my nose. Wonder how long that's been up there.
I remember coming home with a cat... I havent seen it all day. Shit.
Its not even 10am and we are talking about what guys assholes we would finger.
He told the cop he was underage, handed the cop his ID, and the police report read "I then informed the suspect that he was not, in fact, underage"
My Mom printed off all of my Augusts text messages. Apparently I've been drinking WAY too much and having an intermediate drug problem. I have to go home everyw weekend for the rest of the semester
Me too it's so nice. Debated studying out there but woulda been 90% babe-watching 5% flexing 3% studying and 2% talkin my boners down.
You know you're hung-over when you're smoking and have the strong urge to eat the cigarette. No more buckets of gin. No. More. Ever.
Besides the fact that the only male who has shown an interest in me in the last 5 months has a strange and unfortunate resemblance to fucking Frodo, I've been good thanks
I got a text saying, "It's so great to throw tomatoes at seagulls."
that's the second time I've left that bar and slept with the person that's driven my car. thank god I don't take cabs..
Oh and .... you'll love this: my life coach says you writing my online dating profile isn't a horrible idea.
I may or may not have hooked up with the cop who arrested me.. Or I can cross hooking up with a stripper in a cop outfit off my bucket list.
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